My Story-How Sacred Medicine Wear Was Created
Celebrate Freedom From Violence
What a great title, right? It should be an organization, and I am surprised it has not been created yet.
Dec 5th, 2009 I walked away from 20 years of domestic violence and I never looked back. I should have been a statistic, but I knew I was made for more than an object, a tool and someone to own, control and manipulate and I had enough.
I was on the brink of collapse, I had 5 children by 36, and I was running my own business from my house that was self-taught learning in the middle of the night for four years. All with the intention of making enough money to leave the man I was married to. I had been married four times, and each time I left, it was because they took me to the brink.
Since I was 16, when I severely date raped (which continued for a year), until I was 36 I had experienced being raped, prostituted, used and manipulated and threatened, emotionally manipulation, abused, and endured physical and sexual violence. Because of all of this, I became a severe alcoholic for 13 years which almost killed me. I was almost dead when I left my last husband, physically, emotionally and mentally.
I was working 16 hours a day and trying to keep as many fires at bay as possible while planning an escape, which took me 4 years to learn a trade, and eventually I made enough money to leave and live on my own. During this time, I started attending seminars and workshops for years to learn about self-empowerment, self- awareness and self-value which I had none which ironically enough my ex-husband introduced me to.
With my business in tow, and a strong desire to succeed at any cost, I can only go up I figured, and I was then on my own. I met a loving healer Shaman who hired me to work for him, and we began a healing and discovery relationship totally different than anything I had ever experienced. It was the first time I felt love and I started healing my body for 5 years as I detoxed the toxic life I had lived. During that time, we married and have happily been together ever since going on ten years. I fully recovered and boy I am sure glad I didn’t give up on love.
During this time, as I was healing, I had forgotten I was an artist, since my school years in the 80’s, I would paint on anything, my hair, shoes, walls, objects…anything. I would decorate my rooms (my dad moved us every 6 months) each time I would move in, I took it as an opportunity to see what era or what theme I could produce. Shopping at thrift stores and garage sales I picked up items to help create the look, and I would sleep in a fantasy room sometimes in an era of the 1800’s shutting out the world.
As an only child, moving so much, and being raised in a strict cult, I was bullied extensively in school, I eventually got tall enough and started fighting back, which ended up with me being expelled from high school. Growing up in inner cities in East LA, and San Bernardino and the East San Fernando Valley was enough to earn me street smarts, but I was not a well acclimated and socially educated person. My mom was an immigrant from Honduras and my dad was high school drop-out and pot head (a Greaser in the 60’s and an innovator). During my self discovery, as I started my art again, I realized I had come from a long line of tailors on my mothers side, and my dad had patented inventors and visionaries on his side. I tapped into that part of me, and I never looked back.
I love taking things that don’t belong together, and bring them together harmoniously, and when I started working with textiles, that was the beginning of the end. There is no end to the possibilities. My husband and I moved to Malibu, CA and opened a healing center from our home and we have been helping the community, and abroad through sessions, channeled gatherings, international retreats and private coaching to thousands of people. I share my story and how I ended violence and victimization in my life and helped thousands of people find victory. I have spoken internationally and even began filming a documentary on ending violence as a director. I share how I gained stability and strength in my life, and how I healed my relationship with my children and myself. How I dived into creativity, writing books and re-kindling my creativity through art and design, and how I never looked back.
All those volumes of magazines sitting on my top shelf (my most prized possession) in high school that I would pour through memorizing every detail of those glorious glossy pages, all meant something. Those years of trying to be Molly Ringwald, and ripping clothes apart and painting my jeans, meant something. Decorating my rooms, or making blankets and curtains for my children’s bedroom, learning from my mom, meant something. I had no idea, that I would wait until I was 45 years old in 2018, to finally design my first garment that was meant to be taken seriously.
In a short period of time, I have had the opportunity to make a custom jacket for Gary Clark Jr which he wore on stage at the Fonda Theater to perform his last show in Hollywood on his tour. How could this be? He had no idea what he was doing when he did that, the message he was conveying through my garment on his back. He confirmed that dreams do come true, it is not all waisted. Everything I ever did, and ever learned has come full circle to finally afford me the opportunity to make something great that people can enjoy and love.
I now have a studio in the LA Fashion District in Downtown LA, and work side by side with my daughter Alex (Eye of Alexandria) who allowed her creativity and expression flow through painting garments as well. Every dream I could ever dream is coming true, I am here to tell the tale that you could end violence forever if you really, really want to and find a way to celebrate freedom forever!
By wearing one of my garments, you are sharing a message that there is Freedom from Violence. Thank you for being apart of the celebration!